Dear friends and fans of NerdParadise.com/TheDryEraseBoard.com,

We all miss the good old days of Nerd Paradise. Ever since the transition to the Dry Erase Board, content has gotten rather stale. Blake's grand scheme of splitting Nerd Paradise into several related sites, like some good version of CNet, has failed, and the community is suffering for it. We all miss the fun times with the Baloney[sic] Cannon, the Guide to Proper Technique for Brushing Your Teeth, the I Need Sleep videos, and those awesome contests.

Those were good times.

We wanted them back and we know you did too.

We asked Blake if he could bring back Nerd Paradise and the way things used to be. His response was a firm refusal. The Dry Erase Board was his brainchild, he said, and would form the backbone of his internet empire. We begged and pleaded, but he wouldn't budge. Clearly we had no choice--he wasn't listening to reason so we had to do something more drastic. You may have noticed his extended absence of late and wondered where he could be. Well, he hasn't been around because we had kidnapped Blake and were holding him hostage on an undisclosed desert island. He was told that he was being held captive until Nerd Paradise is up and running.

Now you may be wondering how we captured such a clever fellow, but we admins have a few tricks up our sleeve. We lured him out of his well defended apartment by telling him that both Falun and eofpi were in town and wanted to grab a midnight snack. In preparation for this moment (and because Redmond is dead after 10pm) we had slipped a flyer into his newspaper a few days prior announcing that the Fake IHOP was under new management and now on a 24-hour schedule. With this the seeds were set for the Great Blake Trap.

He arrived shortly after midnight. Falun and eofpi engaged him in idle conversation as he entered to keep him distracted and Ushanka directed them to a table. What he neglected to notice was that all the other guests were carefully seated facing away but looked oddly familiar. Stiva arrived to take orders and informed us that sweet tea had been added to the menu and french toast was on special. We saw Blake's eyes light up and knew that he was ours. As he finished his first glass of tea in mere seconds it seemed to dawn on him something was fishy: sweet tea, 24 hour IHOP, Falun and eofpi both in town at once... everything was just too perfect. He started to get worried but it was too late: the sound of the front door being locked made its way back to his table and most of the lights were killed. As the other guests moved into position, Blake realized who they were (Spears, ikr, Jello) and that he was witnessing a revolt. After that it went quickly -- all the exits were covered and the sweet tea had been laced. After about 10 minutes of debate the sedative kicked in and he fell over asleep. Into the box he went and off to a tropical island in the Pacific. When he woke he would see a note from us with our demands.

Enjoy

Love, The Admins XOXOXOXO

eofpi, ikanreed, Spears_Dracona, Falun, Ushanka, Jello, Smurf, Omni